I have been away - not physically but emotionally. I am posting on this gap because to give it no space would mean I was not acknowledging the hugeness of a sadness within.
I lost my very best friend on April 12th. Janie. Who died from a brain tumour. We had her many many months longer than I would have thought possible but she fought for those extra months to be with her children, Julia my goddaughter and her sister Alice. My daughter lost her Godmother. Our friendship and memories go back 35 years - before either of us were married and had children.
This is not meant to be sad 'post' but rather one to say that I am moving on now, glad she is at peace. A quote that I read in Donna's blog as I came online to write this really touched me as in the last couple of days after a fairly awful spell of weather at the end of last week, I have been wandering around our block of land and have been nurtured by it and am feeling restored.
I go to nature be be soothed and healed, and to have my senses put in order.
-- John Burroughs
Nature does have a very generous way of putting our senses in order, giving us perspective. Another way I find of really cheering myself up is to go and buy books! Last week I did just that when I visited the Personal Histories Exhibition at Cleveland Art Gallery - part two of a series of International Book Exhibitions organised and curated by Robyn Foster.
One book really caught my eye and it was a book titled 'Blindspots' by Jack Oudyn of whose work I am a great fan and I am lucky enough to have a few pieces of his work already. I could only see one open page of this little book but knew straight away I had to have it. It is very personal to Jack and is his story to tell, but for me it reminded me of a quote by one of my favourite authors Michael Ondaatje who wrote:
'we remember the time around scars'.
I am sure these photos do not do the books justice as I photographed them through glass with my phone but I am very much looking forward to having it home with me to linger over and enjoy. It will remind me that scars do heal as they are wrapped around by nature and books - not to mention love and the support of friends.
Some would say I have been procrastinating this last few days by wandering about instead of getting down to things in the studio - and there may be truth in that. However, I am here now and feeling better for the wandering.